My typical state is in motion. I’m at my best when I’m busy, when lots of balls are in the air. I get energy from, well, using energy, and often book a full weeknight and weekend calendar so I can squeeze in as much as possible.
I expected things to slow down in a big way when Maggie was born, but to my surprise I didn’t have to pump the brakes nearly as hard as I’d anticipated. Maggie’s an easy, go-with-the-flow baby, and I have great support in Kevin to help juggle things. I’m able to take Maggie with me on many occasions, or he’s able to stay with her when she can’t tag along (like when I teach Pure Barre or host a Beautycounter event).
This has been both a good and bad situation, this whole not really having to slow down thing. It’s mostly good because, like I said, I’m best when I’m on the move. But there are days when my to-do list seems daunting rather than conquerable, and I’m totally wiped out. And then there are whole weeks when I feel that way. (This week is one of those, at least so far.)
I just feel overwhelmed. But also very blah at the same time. Tired, but not sleepy tired. Just tired in an overarching kind of way. Stressed about money and the fact that the house isn’t as clean and organized as I’d like it to be and whether or not I should eat less sugar (usually while I’m eating chocolate chips). You know, just a general uneasiness. Not a great feeling.
On weeks like this one, I do my best to zoom out and get the big picture perspective of my life back in place. To remember that it’s okay to slow down sometimes. That feeling a lack of motivation every now and then is normal. That things are really, really good, and I can let go of some of my stress. (Most of it, even.) That right now is a precious and fleeting time in my life, and I need to soak it all in. Sometimes that means skipping a 6 a.m. Pure Barre class for extra slow-paced, morning snuggle time with Maggie. Sometimes it means saying “no” to a social event that sounds really fun in order to give myself time to just relax. Sometimes that means not feeling like I have to be doing seven things at once every second of the day. Reminding myself that sitting still sometimes is okay. That the unscheduled, off-the-to-do-list moments are often the best moments.
This week, I’m trying to give myself permission to slow things down some, and I think it’s working a little. I’m starting to feel more like me again.
When you experience days and weeks like this one — when you feel overwhelmed and unmotivated — what are some of your go-to coping mechanisms?