‘Tis the season for introspection, and so I thought I’d follow the annual tradition of making some New Year’s resolutions. For the past few years (minus 2014 — not sure what was going on that year!), I’ve written a resolutions post, and so I went back and reviewed those to see where my thoughts were this time last year, and this time in 2013 and 2012.
As it turns out, there are some consistent themes that pop up from year to year. Alas, some of the resolutions I made back in 2012 (and in the years since) are still things I struggle with (namely the over-committing trait). But I’m happy to report that I’ve also grown in the last few years. I compare myself to others less. I am kinder to myself. I’ve gotten better about being still and alone. I’m drinking more water and cooking more meals at home. I’m getting more sleep.
Overall, life is really, really good. And I’m getting more and more content with ME — just as I am. It’s nice to take a moment to recognize that, with each year, I continue to improve myself. This is so important to me, as I never want to stop challenging myself, exploring, learning, and experiencing new things.
And so, as I look into the unknown of the whole of 2016, I want to focus on three key themes: More, Less, and Enough.
- I’m going to give myself more time free from technology. I’m going to put my phone in the other room more when I’m with Kevin, or with friends or family. I’m going to be more present.
- I’m going to save more money. Let’s just say that managing money isn’t my strong suit. I’m going to really work on that in 2016, starting with increasing what I’m saving versus spending.
- I’m going to reach out to others more. Life events are important — the celebratory and the painful, the big and the small. I’ve been reminded this year just how meaningful it is when friends and loved ones show up during hard times, and it’s given me a renewed sense of importance of being that presence in the lives of others, too. I want to send more cards in 2016, make more phone calls, and send more texts, remembering important moments for my friends and family.
- I’m going to read more. I’m in a book club (which I ADORE — it’s such a wonderful group of women), which has brought lots of great books into my life over the past year, but I really need to step it up and read more outside of book club, too. I just don’t make time for reading like I used to, and I miss it.
- I’m going to be more vulnerable. As my perfectionism* has waned over the last few years, I’ve come to learn the benefit of the other side of that coin: vulnerability. By not worrying as much about how people perceive you, you’re able to actually be (gasp!) a fully-formed person to others. And that allows you to truly be known by others, fostering deeper, realer relationships with those people. I’m loving that, and look forward to continuing this journey. (Shout out to Brené Brown for her amazing writing/talks that have helped me start to uncover the magic that is vulnerability. Please check her out if you haven’t! She’s seriously incredible.)
- I’m going to say “yes” to fewer things. I always struggle with over-commitment, largely because I am almost always genuinely interested in the things I say “yes” to. But I’ve learned that it leaves me feeling stretched too thin, and ultimately too overwhelmed to enjoy each activity in full. So this coming year, I’m really going to start incorporating more intentional balance in my life by being a bit more selective with my time.
- I’m going to worry less about things being perfect. *Though I have come a long way as far as my perfectionist tendencies go, I still struggle with wanting everything to be at its best as much as possible: I want our house to be clean and organized at all times, I want to be my best self in all situations, I want my nails to be perfectly painted every day. But guess what? My house ISN’T clean and organized all the time, sometimes I’m not my best self, and my nails…well, actually, those are usually freshly painted every day. (I’m a weirdo, I know.) But back to the whole “perfect” thing. Life isn’t. I’m not. I’m going to try to be more cool with that in 2016.
- I’m going to remember that my life is so amazingly incredible. I’m aware of this fact most of the time, but I’m going to try to be even more mindful of this fact in 2016. I have a husband I couldn’t be more in love with, my family is wonderful, loving, and supportive, I have friends who feel like family, too, I truly love my job, I’m healthy — the list goes on. And on. And so, on days when I’m feeling blah or down or unsettled or unsure, I’m going to remind myself of how lucky I am to live this life.
- I’m going to focus on the things I have — not the things I don’t. As mentioned above, I’m not all that great with money, and shopping is definitely a vice of mine. I can be impulsive about spending, and before I know it I have way too many pairs of workout leggings (you know, for example). In 2016, I’m going to work on reminding myself to pause and take stock of all the things I already have (which is far too much, to be sure) before clicking “Place Order” on Nordstrom.com.
What are your resolutions for 2016?